The Nakeds

We have naked neighbors.

Not like "ugly naked guy" from Friends or anything that obscene. But our across-the-street neighbors have a problem with appropriate clothing.

A bit of background info:

1. they drive a HUGE van that always has a kayak on the top.

2. they occasionally bring our 90 y.o. neighbor, Guy, (more on him later) dinner on plates, which they then proceed to eat on his front porch. so yes, nice people, no complaints there.

The issue relevant for discussion is that they have never, in the 3 months that we have lived in the house on Callowhill, worn clothing.

"She" wears baggy board-shorts, a string bikini top, flip-flops, and her long, stringy brown hair down to her shoulders. I can see her skin stretching over her ribs on her back from my front porch. "He" also wears baggy board shorts, and no shirt, his long hair and long beard completely unfamiliar to any grooming instrument. Reggie says, they are "freakish" looking up close due to the extreme "skinniness." We watch them like visitors to the zoo, only a mile down the road- "the nakeds are out again," "the nakeds parked their van in the neighbors driveway," "the nakeds are laying in the grass in front of their townhouse, reading." Present tense comments, zero interpretation.

Call them what you will- hippies, surfers, whatever. But this is western Pennsylvania! And it was 60 degrees this morning! If we lived in California, or Florida, or anyplace within walking or mo-ped distance of a sandy beach, I wouldn't bat an eye. But this is Pittsburgh. And even at that, we are miles from any of the 3 rivers. And it is legitimately Fall.

So we add "the nakeds" to the cast of characters on our urbansuburban set.